Yey Birthday...But why am i not excited?

I recently met a couple and their 8 year old son. I immediately grew very fond of their son as he was very smart and very adorable. I recently sent him a Speed Racer car as I know that its his favorite movie. His mom told me that he was ecstatic upon receiving the gift. He was doing a dozen cartwheels per minute! It was a random gift and it cost me $12.00 to make the kid very happy.

As the years passed by, I realized that it gets harder and harder for me to be happy. I normally can be amused by the tiniest things and sometimes really absurd events. I am not sure if its because I am getting older and that I have experienced a lot more emotions than when I was a kid. Pain. Hurt. Sorrow. Love. Failure. Success. Or have i turned cynical and accuse the universe of conspiring with the elements to make it more difficult for me to be happy. I don't know.

I am turning 31 this September 12. According to my friends, it is my last calendar year. Next year, my age can't be found in the calendar anymore. I am officially old. Although I don't feel old. Some would say, I don't look old. I still get carded whenever I go to clubs or bars! Thanks to my parents for that (oh and a tons of moisturizing products from Kiehls!) It's hard not to think of what has happened in those 31 years of existence. Then I realize that it was mostly and generally a good 31 years of my life. I should be happy.

I will. I promise.